The tragic, unromantic history of Valentine's Day (2024)

Oh, Valentine’s Day: the annual day of romance, roses, cards, hearts, chocolates, and maybe even wedding rings. At least, that’s what we’ve come to know of it. But how did this romantic holiday begin? You may be surprised by the religious, mysterious, bizarre, and bloody origins of the now-commercialized and cheery day of love. What is the history? Who was Saint Valentine, anyway?

V-Day is one of the most consumer-centric holidays of the year, with more than a billion cards sent annually, surpassing all other holidays except Christmas. But unlike many other holidays, there are a lot of unknown facts about the lovey-dovey holiday’s origins. In fact, some of the history is nothing more than a confusing mix of age-old legends.

So, what should be the true meaning of Valentine’s Day?

  • Who was Saint Valentine?
  • History of Valentine’s Day: Pagan or Christian?
  • So, why the romance?
  • Why Cupid and Valentine’s Day?
  • The first Valentine’s Day greeting cards
  • Valentine’s Day around the world

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History of Valentine’s Day: Pagan or Christian?

Valentine’s Day history has somewhat blurred origins. Why is Valentine’s Day in mid-February? While the date is meant to honor Saint Valentine’s death and burial, which supposedly occurred in mid-February around 270 AD, some historians believe the date could reflect the Catholic Church’s attempt to replace the ancient Pagan celebration of Lupercalia — a fertility festival for the pagan agricultural god Faunus — with a Christian event in memory of the saint.

At this pagan event, which traditionally took place on 15 February, Roman men allegedly drew the names of Roman women from a jar to be coupled with during the festival, often leading to true love, or so the story goes. Lupercalia became officially outlawed in the late 400s when Pope Gelasius replaced it by deeming 14 February as Saint Valentine’s Day.

In short, it could be said that the meaning of Valentine’s Day commemorates Saint Valentine’s brutal and bloody three-part execution – beating, stoning, and beheading – because of his secret support of Christian marriages. 14 February symbolizes the date he died or possibly because Christians needed to replace the pagan Lupercalia.

The first Valentine’s Day greeting cards

The history of Valentine’s Day cards is a more modern story. Though vocal greetings were exchanged during the holiday’s fifth-century origins, writing and sending cards didn’t become common practice until the 1400s when the Duke of Orléans sent one to his wife from the Tower of London’s prison. King Henry V soon joined the trend by hiring a writer to write a Valentine’s card for Catherine of Valois.

When Valentine’s Day became more popular in England in the 1600s and the United States in the 1700s, hand-written greetings, as well as small gifts, became more common. The aptly-named Mother of the Valentine, Esther Howland, is credited with the first homemade valentine cards, using elaborate lace, tapes, and photos called scrap.

Modern printing largely replaced the hand-written tradition in the 1900s; in 1913, Hallmark began their first batch of mass-produced valentine’s cards.

Valentine’s Day around the world

Which countries celebrate Valentine’s Day? While many countries have typical celebrations and the typical traditions of cards, flowers, chocolates, and fancy dates, some countries have some very unique traditions to celebrate the romantic holiday; if you’re dating someone from a different culture than yours, your valentine might approach the day differently.

The tragic, unromantic history of Valentine's Day (2)

Add some international flair to your romantic ideas by see how the world celebrates Valentine’s Day.

Valentine’s Day in Belgium

As the holiday is not as commercialized in Belgium, the Belgians aren’t known for being especially festive on the day itself. But, as the chocolate capital of the world, it’s no surprise chocolate features highly on the gift list, even if purchased at the last minute. Dating rules in Belgium, however, is where you might find more differences.

How to say ‘I love you’ in Belgium: Ik zie je graag or Ik hou van jou (Dutch), or je t’aime (French)

How to say ‘Happy Valentine’s Day’ in Belgium: just “Happy Valentine’s Day”

Valentine’s Day in Denmark

The Danish make their Valentine’s Day their own by sending folded white paper flowers known as snowdrops.

In addition, they add humor to their hand-written cards, as well as keep them anonymous to keep you guessing about your secret admirer.

Valentine’s Day in France

The French have been celebrating Valentine’s Day in some form since the Middle Ages. It is still a very popular, commercialized celebration today. In fact, more than 70% of the French take part in the day of love, spending an average of €50 on gifts such as flowers or jewelry. See what other French dating rulesyou need to brush up on.

How to say ‘I love you’ in French: Je t’aime

How to say ‘Happy Valentine’s Day’ in French: Bonne St-Valentin

Valentine’s Day in Germany

Germans only started celebrating Valentinstag shortly after the Second World War, from American soldiers stationed in the country. Cards are not as common in Germany; instead, Germans prefer more elaborate love declarations. A common German Valentine’s tradition is to give a heart-shaped gingerbread cookie. The cookie is complete with an affectionate icing message and a long ribbon so that the gift can be worn before eaten. Learn more about dating in Germany.

How to say ‘I love you’ in German: Ich liebe Dich

How to say ‘Happy Valentine’s Day’ in German: Alles gute zum Valentinstag, Schönen Valentinstag, or Happy Valentinstag

Valentine’s Day in Japan

On this particular day, Japanese dating strays away from traditional gender ideas. Instead, women first give chocolates to the men. Much thought goes into whether it should be giri chocolate (for friends and acquaintances) or honmei chocolate (for your true love).

Women in Japan receive gifts exactly one month later on White Day. On this day, men give women white chocolate or other tokens.

Valentine’s Day in the Netherlands

It’s perhaps no surprise that the tulip-loving nation’s celebrations have flowery origins. While Valentijnsdag didn’t become widely-celebrated until the 1990s, its origins stem from flower day. The National Organization for Florists declared this day asa way to sell more flowers locally versus exporting them all on the romantic holiday. Thus, a card and flowers are still popular gifts for the Dutch, though these aren’t the only common gifts when dating Dutch men and women.

How to say ‘I love you’ in Dutch: Ik hou van jou

How to say ‘Happy Valentine’s Day’ in Dutch: Fijne valentijnsdag

Valentine’s Day in the Philippines

Perhaps the most contrasting tradition occurs in the Philippines, where a Valentine’s Day trend has started of mass weddings. Hundreds of couples gather in the same place to either exchange or renew their vows.

In 2015, more than 700 couples took part in the new tradition. Because on the day of romance, why not make it a group affair?

Valentine’s Day in Portugal

While the Portuguese celebrate Valentine’s Day similar to many other countries, they have one unique tradition: it’s custom to send a woman a gift basket of gourmet treats, and to send a man a basket of their favorite liqueurs.

How to say ‘I love you’ in Portuguese: Eu te amo or eu te quero

How to say ‘Happy Valentine’s Day’ in Portuguese: Feliz Dia dos Namorados

Valentine’s Day in South Africa

In South African culture, women aren’t shy on Valentine’s Day. Rather, they take after the ancient Romans by mimicking Lupercalia traditions. Instead of drawing names, they pin the name of their crush to their shirt for all to see; they do this whether the person knows it already or not.

How to say ‘I love you’ in Afrikaans: Ek het jou lief

How to say ‘Happy Valentine’s Day’ in Afrikaans: Gelukkige Valentynsdag

Valentine’s Day in Spain

Spaniards celebrate Saint Valentine’s Day similar to elsewhere. However, they also have local festivals with similar themes. Valencia, for example, celebrates Saint Dionysius Day (the Spanish patron saint of love) on 9 October by hosting festive parades and gifting women with traditional Mocadora marzipan figurines. In Catalonia, locals celebrate Saint George Day, also known as El Día de la Rosa or El Día de la Libre (the day of the rose or book), on 23 April by gifting roses and books.

In light of the commercialism surrounding these holidays, some Spaniards jokingly call the holiday Día de El Corte Inglés, a popular Spanish department store. See what else to expect whendating the Spanish.

How to say ‘I love you’ in Spanish: Te amo or te quiero

How to say ‘Happy Valentine’s Day’ in Spanish: Feliz Dia de San Valentin

Valentine’s Day in the United Kingdom

Wales make their Valentine’s Day celebrations unique not by commemorating Saint Valentine, but rather their own Saint Dwynwen. Dwynwen is the Welsh patron saint of lovers; Wales celebrates this saint on 25 January. On this day, love spoons replace the cards; this comes from an old Welsh tradition where men would hand-carve elaborate wooden spoons for their lovers with meanings behind each carved symbol.

The tragic, unromantic history of Valentine's Day (2024)

FAQs

What is the dark history behind Valentine's day? ›

One Valentine was a priest in third-century Rome who defied Emperor Claudius II after the ruler outlawed marriage for young men. St. Valentine would perform marriages in secret for young lovers, ultimately leading to his death.

What is the history of Valentine's day answer? ›

Others say it is rooted in the history of Saint Valentine himself. The evidence indicates that the origins of Valentine's Day are more likely tied to a 14th-century poem by Geoffrey Chaucer than to a 3rd-century Christian saint.

What is the tragic history of Valentines day? ›

In short, it could be said that the meaning of Valentine's Day commemorates Saint Valentine's brutal and bloody three-part execution – beating, stoning, and beheading – because of his secret support of Christian marriages.

What is the hidden truth about Valentine's day? ›

The festival was meant to encourage a woman's fertility and pay homage to Faunus, the Roman god of agriculture, as well as Romulus and Remus, the Roman founders. It began with the sacrifice of a goat (representing fertility) and a dog (representing purification).

What does the Bible say about Valentine's Day? ›

1 John 4:7-12. Dear friends: let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.

Should Christians celebrate Valentine's Day? ›

If that works for you, do it. But the biblical pattern teaches us that romantic love between husband and wife should be on display often and much. It isn't that celebrating Valentine's Day is too much; it is too little and weak. Christians, live your married years so that you don't need Valentine's Day.

Who invented Valentine's day? ›

At the end of the 5th century, Pope Gelasius declared February 14 St. Valentine's Day, and since then, February 14th has been a day of celebration—though it was generally more religious than romantic.

Is Valentine's day biblical? ›

While certain elements might lead people to believe Valentine's Day is Christian, the first celebrations might have been less than holy. Some historians believe that Valentine's Day originated as a pagan festival and was later adopted by the church to honor Saint Valentine.

Is Valentine's day a pagan holiday? ›

Some scholars have suggested that Valentine's Day has its roots in the ancient Roman festival of Lupercalia. Celebrated on February 15, Lupercalia was a bloody and even brutal affair in which animals would be sacrificed in the Lupercal cave at the base of Palatine Hill in Rome.

How many murders happened on Valentine's day? ›

The seven men slain during the Saint Valentine's Day Massacre.

What was the oldest known Valentine's day message written? ›

The oldest known Valentine still exists today as a poem written by Charles Duke of Orleans to his wife while he was imprisoned in the Tower of London following his capture at the Battle of Agincourt. The greeting that was written in 1415 is part of the manuscript collection at the British Library in London.

Who started Valentine's day and why? ›

Valentine is likely based on a combination of two Valentines who were executed on February 14 in different years by Roman Emperor Claudius II in the 3rd century A.C.E., according to NPR. The Catholic Church maybe have established St. Valentine's Day to honor these two martyrs.

What does the word "valentine" mean? ›

The name Valentine comes from a Latin word meaning “strength.” There are many legends about it, but it's ultimately unclear how Valentine's Day became associated with the tradition of exchanging the affectionate gifts and love notes that we call valentines.

Why did Pope Gelasius create Valentine's day? ›

According to History.com, by 496 AD, Pope Gelasius declared February 14 as the Feast of Saint Valentine, as an effort to replace the pagan Feast of Lupercalia, which was related to health and fertility, with a Christian holiday.

Who was killed at the St. Valentine's day massacre? ›

The victims included gang members Adam Heyer, Frank Gusenberg, Pete Gusenberg, John May, Al Weinshank, and James Clark, as well as a visitor, Dr. Reinhardt H. Schwimmer. The St.

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